2.28.2011

Beauty in the Night Sky

The night air on February 24th was wonderful as I walked back from my painting class in Todd. The temperature was perfect outside, not chilly, not humid, but a balmy blanket of comfort. Coupled with the wind that was blowing in from the West, the air itself was in perfection. It was like the few minutes before a Florida thunderstorm where the air is preparing for the impact of a storm. Even the smell in the air reminded me of the summers I’ve been in Florida where the thunderstorms down there are a sight to see and experience. Although most of the day had been spent with an overcast sky looming overhead, all of the clouds had been cleared from the night sky by the wind. The few clouds that slipped through the night air were a perfect shade of greys, purples and deep blues set against a beautiful black sky that was dotted with an innumerable amount of stars. Looking at this sky through the barren trees of Peck Forest gave my walk back to the dorm a sense of being in an enchanted forest making my way back home. Seeing the stars through the clouds made me yearn to travel into space. I’ve always wanted to be an astronaut; even now, it would be amazing if I had the chance to fly into the black expanse that surrounds this world. Traveling into the unknown like that would be an out of body experience that nothing would ever compare to in my life. The freedom to move, unrestrained by any worldly boundaries, fuels my desire to place myself among the stars. “To travel to the furthest reaches of the galaxy” is something I would love to accomplish. The whole essence of the night of February 24th made me feel absolutely alive and awake to the world around me and how beautiful it truly is. Nature is one of the most wonderful things that God ever gave us, and I love experiencing little moments like this, as I stand right in the center of it. In His presence, seeing His beauty all around me.

2.13.2011

Psalm 11:3

"When the foundations are being destroyed, what can the righteous do?"

My laziness in getting up this morning to attend a church here in Murfreesboro allowed me to stay in my room and watch a podcast of a sermon from Faith Promise church back in Knoxville. Granted, I was not able to enjoy singing praises of worship to my Father before listening to a sermon, but while writing this, I am listening to some wonderful music that sings His praises. The sermon's title was "The View: The Failing Family," and over the next few weeks, the theme will be God's view on what is happening with the world right now. I love how God ties instances in our lives together and weaves my days together. Watching "The Failing Family" sermon came after a group discussion of problems that we face today that I attended last night in my dorm. Now, to clarify: this meeting was not an AA meeting in any sense, but the event was called "V-day" (and not relating to Valentines day, but the V stood for vagina). As rash as it might seem to use this word to name an event or even to talk about casually, the ideas and opinions discussed last night among friends and strangers helped each and every one of us who attended. V-day is meant to raise awareness about abuse and mistreatment of women not just in our society but those all around the world. However, this discussion also allows for men to get involved and talk about their opinions too (this is not a femi-nazi extremist group session by all means haha).

Now to explain why this morning's sermon and my group discussion last night tied together. Last night we did an activity where our host of the event had us stand on one side of a line, and when she asked a question, we were to step across the line if the answer to that question was a yes for us. However, if we felt uncomfortable in answering, we did not have to make a move. This activity allowed us to be open with no need for an explanation. And we saw how many people actually have gone through the same life events as us even though we thought we were always alone. At the beginning, the questions were easy. As the activity continued, the issues became more personal, brought up more memories, hurts were seen, and vulnerability was at its peak. Whether or not we were friends with people at the beginning of the night; by the end, we were all close in some way because we had been revealed, seen with no hate or judgment.

Late in the activity, the questions greatly focused on family and how we had been hurt by them or had been affected in a positive manner by them. The greater number of those in attendance had family problems, of which I will not disclose but know that they are problems that are so prominent in our society that everyone knows they are happening. Then why does no one do anything about them? Why do they keep happening? Why aren't there a majority of wonderful, close families out there? Yes, nothing is going to be always perfect, but why can't things be good most of the time?

Seeing those hurt by the ones that should be the closest to them hurt my heart. I take great pride in my family, and I have strong family values. These are the people that should build you up when everyone else is tearing you down. Where unconditional love is learned, felt, and acted out every day. When I see that people never experienced what I have, I hurt for them. They deserved it but never received it. I wish that everyone, strangers or friends, could know the unconditional family love that I have felt all of my life. The family is a unit that should never be torn to pieces, yet that has what has happened today.

"The Failing Family" talked about the family unit, what it should be like but how it actually is. The family is a foundation (Psalm 11:3), but when it is destroyed, who can rebuild it? (Only God.) The definition of family has become skewed and changed over time. The intended version: created by the God who created the whole concept comes from Genesis, the very first book of the Bible and where the creation of the world is seen. Genesis 2:24, a man is to leave his father and mother and become united with a woman to create a family. Adam and Eve were told to populate the earth. Husbands and wives were meant to have children, to create families of their own. And yet, families everywhere are broken, incomplete, not what was intended. Earth is Eden un-intended. Everything was meant to be perfect, beautiful, without the tiniest flaw. It was ruined, destroyed, and murdered. All by the one who hates us, who hates God, who hates anything beautiful. To be God was Satan's desire, and when denied that "privilege," he threw a child temper-tantrum. He vowed to hate what God loved, destroy what God created, twist what God said was right. He destroyed the family unit from the very beginning. That foundation meant to bring life was torn just was it was beginning to bloom. And now years and years later that hatred for us has only continued; Satan never finished. He works daily to counteract the wonders of God. If he can destroy the foundation, the house built on that foundation will crumble in time.

And yes, I know that this world, us, and our hearts can not be fully fixed or healed until God returns for us. It is a disparity we have to live with...unfortunately. However, the silver lining can always be found, no matter how dark a cloud may be or how deep that sliver of light is hiding. We can work through the trials in our lives; we have the ability to help others who have faced the same things we have. We must care, because most of the world doesn't. For the time being, we can make things better. Our works might be destroyed again, but that is why we were not made to be alone. Many is better than one. We were made for each other. Eve was made for Adam. They were to help each other, build the other up, give life to the other. God breathed life itself into Adam; what people don't realize today is that God still has breath left to give. If we feel alone, defeated, or lost, God is waiting to breathe life into our bodies once more. He wants to see us flourish, to accomplish amazing feats in our lives.

But it is our choice. We have to ask. He will not force anything on us. If we want life; we have to ask. Simple enough, yet that request is so difficult to leave our lips. We have to clear that hurtle. Keep running until we reach the finish (no matter how far that might be). Hope is living in the world; people just have to grasp it. Believe that there is something better out there. Believe that with your whole being, and guess what? You will find it.

So don't give up...please don't.

2.06.2011

It's been a while...

Time has been pretty much none existent for me the past couple of weeks- especially this past week where the only "rest" I had was about 6-7 hours of sleep each night and where I was up from 6am to 11pm most days... So yeah, time for writing on here had to be put aside, but even with the homework that I have to do tonight, I thought I would speak for a bit.

To start off, the last church I went to was New Vision Baptist, three Sundays ago.. So no new updates on churches for the past two weeks, but I will talk about my experience at N.V. since I have not written about that yet.

I really enjoyed my Sunday morning being at this church. It reminded me of my parent's church back home, Faith Promise. It was a very young church, contemporary, concert like worship, and..a smoke machine, which I think gives a cool ambiance to the room but always wondered the necessity of the contraption.. Anyways, this Sunday I actually went to church with a few friends from campus. We arrived at N.V. about 15 minutes before the service started (which apparently one should be there about 30 minutes early to get a seat.) From the outside, the church looks huge, but the actual sanctuary is not that big and only accommodates a certain amount of people. Fortunately, we found enough seats for the 5 of us..on the front row. We started out the service with song worship, something I always love getting into. Afterward, one of the preachers made a few announcements, and then the head preacher came up and finished up the series which had started 2 weeks ago called, "Hello. My name is Satan."

Basically, the series was about the different and not obvious reasons that the devil can gain a foothold in our lives. This week's session focused on how to protect against his advance by putting on the armor of God. Of course being in a church all my life, I had heard this part of the Bible preached on numerous times, but there were quite a few new things that I learned that Sunday.

After, he was done with the sermon, the middle school pastor came on stage and gave a few more announcements. An offering was taken and with a prayer, the service ended. Upon leaving the sanctuary, my friends and I went to the college room and had lunch, which the church provides for the students every Sunday after the first service. Being sub-sandwiches, it was quite yummy. My friends and I along with a few new faces at the table we sat at had some good conversations. Once the lunch was over, we went back to campus and I continued on with my day.

The service at New Vision gave me a couple of things to think about and how I need to always protect myself from being exposed to the devil and anything that he might try to do to harm me. Of course, I know that there are certain things that he cannot do because I am a child of God and am protected by my Father, but satan does have the power to oppress me. And I need to pray for the power to resist him through my God. The past week and I'm sure the next few will be stressful to me, but I need to not let myself become depressed or down because then I will be at my weakest and where the devil can place his attack on me. I need God in this time (as in every season of my life), or I know I will become bogged down with too much on my mind and body. Life is stressful; God wants to make it stress-free. He can. I'm sure of it.